A Holiday Survival Guide: Setting Boundaries

Tis the season for many us to engage in extensive shopping, crowded malls, crowded parking lots, and trying to find the latest toy in stock! For family dinners and conversations about politics and sensitive topics. Tis the season to remember the authentic meaning of the holiday gratitude, spiritual traditions, and family togetherness.

As the holiday’s begin to approach many of us will experience various different emotions.  Some days we might feel excited and full of joy and other days we might feel sad or overwhelmed by the holiday pressures we place on ourselves. Most days, more than one emotion will coexist with each other and that’s okay.

The reality is that this time of year can be challenging for reasons such as strained relationships with family members or friends, reminder of trauma, financial pressures, or feelings of sadness and loneliness. All this reasons and others, are quite normal.

This Holiday Season, is a perfect time to set boundaries:

1.   Boundaries with Family.

It is okay to say “no.” Give yourself permission to take a step back from family gatherings that you might find difficult. If you must attend, then try to limit the time you spend together.

2.    Boundaries with Gifts

Set a budget that you feel comfortable with spending. Ask yourself, do I really want to be paying Christmas gifts during the summer? What is most important to you? Does a monetary budget really mean that you care more or less for a person?

3.   Boundaries with Social Media Expectations

Don’t pressure yourself to mirror social media’s expectations and spend more money than you are comfortable with. Social media can make us feel pressure to spend a monetary value of gifts in an effort to show your loved ones you care.

4.    Boundaries with Yourself

BE KIND TO YOU! Allow yourself to not feel EXCITED about the holidays and focus your attention of what brings you joy around the holidays. Ask yourself, “what makes me happy during the holidays?” AND DO IT!
5.    Boundaries with Self-Care

Engage in activities that you find calming and relaxing this can look like reading a book, enjoying a cup of tea, meditating, completing a long-overdue task, or unplugging from the Internet for a while.

6.    Boundaries with Mental Health

Practice self-awareness. What emotions keeps coming up: sadness, hopelessness, or helplessness or overwhelmed. If these emotions are persistent, reach out for help from a mental health professional who can work with you on identifying sources of stress and how to effectively cope with them.